You know you’re a runner when... (Part III)

...You’d rather dart across the road in front of a car instead of slow down your time by waiting for the car to pass on that 5.234-mile course you’ll never see again somewhere in Ontario.

...You would never DREAM of comparing your time from a 5.234-mile course with a 5.235-mile course.

...You wonder why people give you startled looks when they see you running...in the middle of the winter...at 4 AM...in a tank top...

...You’re running so early to get your workout in that the local teenagers haven’t even gone to bed yet.

...As soon as you get your PR, your mind immediately goes to “If I could just take off five more seconds, I could...”

...You could frighten a hard-core biker with the stories of your injuries and extreme-condition runs.

...You’ve injured things that even your doctor didn’t even know existed.

...You proclaim to your friend after a cold winter run with blood, sweat, tears, snot and spit dripping down your body, “Isn’t running a beautiful thing!?”

...One of your most proud accomplishments is running in -4º weather and NOT dying.

...As you lie on the couch icing both knees and your ankle while eating enough spaghetti to fuel an elephant for a week and telling your friend on the phone about how you went running that morning through three feet of snow and nearly got lost the wind was whipping so hard, you shake your head wonder how there could people in the world who don’t like running.

Christmas Eve!

Today I headed out for the same course as yeasterday, the one with the nice hill at the two-and-a-half-mile-mark.

The morning was a tad frosty, chilly, but only because of a good wind blowing around. I did the same thing, running the first 13 or so minutes with my dad, then continuing on and running back, trying to get a better time that yesterday.

But since it was Christmas Eve, what better a time to run? Quickly speed the minutes by as the anticipation builds for Christmas day tomorrow! As I ran, the smell of someone baking cookies drifted around the silent, chilled neighborhood.

Now I want cookies...

Even with the wonderful smell of cookies filling my mind, I still finished the five-mile course in 42:55, faster than yesterday! Yay!

Warm cocoa and fluffy snow to all,
~Darkness

Christmas Eve-Eve

I woke up bright and early today to get my run in with my dad before my relatives came over for Christmas Eve-Eve. Darkness was just fading from the sky as the sun rose behind the rain clouds casting an eerie light upon the land. Rain from a storm that had devastated Colorado in the form of snow splattered around us, soaking us through.

The run today was an out-and-back with a nice hill right at the two-mile mark. A really nice hill. Almost a quarter mile long (perhaps even) and placed in the perfect spot, this hill was perfect for a training run. My dad stopped at about 1 1/4-mark, more precisely at 13:07, and I continued on to the hill.

And, ah, did it look marvelous enveloped in the early-morning light coated in a blanket of rainwater. Rolling up in front of me, gradually getting less steep, then shooting back up towards the sky.

Though, sadly, I have yet to find a hill that doesn't end. So quite predictably, this one did. So sad.

Much peace, love, hills and running cheer,
~Darkness

Of frogs and running

When I was little, I was obsessed with frogs. Couldn’t get enough of them. I waded waist-deep in mucky ponds just to net one and bring it home for the day.

Since I moved away from my old house about eight years ago, I’ve barely done any frog-catching, due to the fact that most of the good ponds were near my old house--an hour or so away.

But little did I know that my next encounter with one of those green amphibians would be during a run. Around a college campus. In December.

I started off my run like any other, just jogging around to fill the fifty minutes, when I ran by something small and green on the side of the road. I thought to myself, “That looked a lot like a frog...”

So I turned around, and sure enough, it was a frog! It had rained the other day, so apparently it had hopped from wherever it used to live and ended up on the side of the road. Well away--from a frog’s perspective, there was a lake about a mile and a half away, though it would have had to cross a few busy streets to get to this point--from any large water source.

I scooped him up and continued jogging, trying not to bounce him too much, pondering where I could find water. Unfortunately the before mentioned lake was too far off--I had something to do just a few minutes after my run--for me to take him there.

But it just so happened that the college campus I was running on had something they called a “Leadership Garden.” A small path through a grouping of trees with benches and--a pond!

It was a small pond (only about 6 feet around), but it was filled with leaves and there wouldn’t be any chemicals in it that would harm the frog.

So I sprinted across the campus, hands in front of me cupping the frog so that it didn’t jump out while I was running. It also just so happened that there was a campus tour going on for a local high school, and I sprinted through the whole pack of them.

No, I’m not crazy. I’m just sprinting around with a frog that I’m going to put in the leadership garden! I’m normal...

In the end, I the frog got to the pond and finished my run in 52:24. After that, I proceeded in scrubbing my hands thoroughly in hot water. Three times.

Ah, frogs. Ah, running. How I love thee.

Peace!
~Darkness

"No man should outlive his fictional wizard" ~Homer Simpson

This is the quote that was running (ha) through my mind all during my 39:26 measured five-miler. At first, it was funny, then around mile two is was the most ingenious thing that I'd ever heard in my life! It was in fact so funny, that I started laughing out loud and giving the "thumbs up" to random passersby and cars. And a policeman. Yes. The runner is a strange creature, is it not?

It in fact amused me so much that I ran what was supposed to be a somewhere-around-45-minute-to-50-minute-run in 39:26, as stated above. Which is, scarily, one of my fastest five-mile times. Heh-heh.

It also helped that the course was quite straight (starting five miles away from my house, ending at my house), unlike the strange winding courses that I usually do just t fill the 50-minute allotment of time.

Well, ta ta for now!
~Darkness


"No man should outlive his fictional wizard" ~Homer Simpson

The mind of a runner is a frightening thing

And that it is.

It would be a very histerical--and sometimes downright scarry--thing to travel into a runner's mind while he or she is doing what he or she does best.

Today I'm going to relate some of the randomness that I thought about on my 49:59 (I know... I should have just gone ONE MORE SECOND!!) run:


So the A's don't have Zito. But Embree's coming. That's gonna be sweet. Zito's pretty simmilar to Drew Bledsoe, neither are consistantly spectacular any more. Though Zito can get whatever he wants, and Bledsoe's a second-string QB. And Zito's pretty great a lot, Bledsoe can throw a good pass here and there. No, they're not the same.

Wow! I can't beleive that I've been running for 34 minutes! Seems strange. I guess I should think about the A's more often. They should perscribe that: "Run easier! Fill your thoughts with the Oakland A's! Act now!" It's really hot out now. Why is everyone dressed like it's ten below? Is it cool? Bobby Kielty and Nick Swisher are cool. Though if you're cool, it's a good thing. If you're cold, it's a bad thing. There really isn't that much of a difference between the word "cool" and the word "cold". Strange. Boston Legal is a funny show. But The Office is on tonight. That guy on there is hillarious! What's his name? I know it's not Michael, but I keep wanting to call him that. Ooh! 39 minutes! Better head back. I wonder if I'll have to rush? I think it's somewhere around seven minutes from the path, but was I going slower then? I guess I'll wing it. Do laps around the circle. Tracks suck and cirlces are like tracks. Circles suck.


Something even more fun than thinking about the A's while one runs (especially if you couldn't care less about them) is to in fact think about what you're thinking about. While you're thinking about that sentance, it'll confound you long enough to tick off a couple more minutes. ;-)

Happy yoggings!

~Darkness

Winter wonderland

Today was the second snow of the season! But the first time running in it for me. Everything looked like a postcard, trees laced with a swath of shimmering white while quiet little flakes drifted lazilly down from the dusty gray sky.

I poked my head out the door, watching my breath puff off into the sky, and quickly drew back in. I was dressed fine for running, except for hand protection. Unfortunatly, I was away from my house and the orray of thousands of colorful running gloves turing slightly grayish with time and dirt. So instead of head out and end up with my knuckles ending up as dry, bleading masses, I headed into the bathroom, grabbed a paper towel and wrapped it around my fists, clutching the ends of the bandages in my palms.

I headed out and was quite surprised at how well they worked, considering they were paper-thin! Har-har-har!! Hoo-boy. That was bad.

The one thing my design lacked was thumb protection, and I only noticed this about ten minutes into the run. I scrunched my thumbs under my fingers, trying to keep the paper towel wraps in place. And we wonder why people give us strange looks.

Though after the run I was quite happy with my invention. Perhaps some day I can design and sell my own line of Wraps Running Gloves!

Till next time,
~Darkness